Don’t Think, Dear: On Loving and Leaving Ballet (2023) By: Alice Robb
While this one may seem a little “off-topic”, let me just confirm that it exemplifies trauma, addiction, eating disorders, predatory grooming, and then some within the microcosm of the ballet world [Trigger Warning when reading]. This book got my brain spinning around from so many different angles, integrating my background studying dance history (RIP Dr. Ries–IYKYK), sociology, and social work; my lens as a dance/movement therapist; and my own personal experiences growing up in the dance world. I appreciate the way this author incorporates so much history to help provide cultural context for the trajectory of dance and ballet culture and integrates with anecdotes of her own and other dancers’ personal experiences. While I didn’t grow up strictly in the ballet world (and did not have a comparable experience as outlined in this book), there are some other cultural components that do spread throughout the larger dance world. Some of the things that resonated with me is the focus of valuing the body of the dancer (and what it can or cannot do) over the person–at one point the author described how the dancer’s body is the machine with which to create the artistic outcome, comparing the dancer’s body with the Picasso’s paint brushes. And while I see the point (there is no room for individualism in the aesthetic visual created by the corp de ballet), it also brings to light the developmental trauma associated with not having the space (and safety) to cultivate a core sense of self, having one’s sense of inclusion/connection be fragile and dependent on what one can do versus who they are (reference to Polyvagal Theory), and cultivating these trauma responses of competition for survival (reference to Dr. Gabor Maté’s Myth of Normal).
How did I hear about this book: a dancer-friend shared it with me
Would I recommend this book to my colleagues: My dance therapy colleagues, definitely. Other general recommendations might be more case-by-case basis
Would I recommend this book to my clients: If it seems to resonate with specific client experiences (e.g., if they had dance backgrounds that likely contributed to some of the challenges/trauma we are working on healing).
How do I apply this content to my work: One of the ways I facilitate healing in both my trauma and addiction work is assessing for whether the client has developed a true sense of self or whether it appears that have developed more of a shell or facade to help them get the sense they have a place in this world. I combine dance/movement therapy modalities with other techniques and modalities to support this process. Additionally, this book speaks to this necessity, as well as exemplifying the correlation between this kind of developmental trauma and the path to substance use disorders and/or eating disorders. As I read this book, I reflected on concepts such as Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, Polyvagal Theory, Dan Siegel’s 4 S’s, Attachment Theory, and some of Gabor Maté’s work as well.
Moving forward, given the unique combination of my clinical experiences and training, I’d love to work with dancers/former dancers who resonate with the author’s experiences.
